The Today Show aired a segment on “Money rules that can save your relationship”. I completely agree with ALL of these but specifically the one about declaring your own independence with money. I’ve talked about it before and we live this rule every day.
Take a look at the video clip here
Tags: budgeting, household finances, joint finances, sales, savings, spending mistakes, tips, today show, video clip
No one is perfect. I make spending mistakes all the time. Here are 5 poor ones I continue to make:
Like I said, no one is perfect. I am very honest with myself and the Mr. about my weaknesses. Admitting you have the problem is the first step, right? I find that our split finance arrangement helps combat this. I’m less likely to spend my own money and most of these things can’t come from the joint account because they aren’t in the budget. However, I still make these mistakes. The only thing I can say to defend myself is that I’ve progressed from making them every day to making them rarely. I keep myself in check by reviewing my personal account statement now and then. The worst feeling is adding up all the money I’ve spent on fast food each month. But, it does remind me and then I make that mistake less the following month. Another thing that helps is setting a goal. If I set a personal goal to save up and purchase something big, like the latest gadget, then I will remind myself every time I step foot into a store.
A few tips for you:
Allow yourself a little slack when you slip up but remember that discipline is the key to saving.
Leave a comment with mistakes you make too so I won’t feel like such a heel.
Tags: budgeting, costco, household finances, joint finances, retail therapy, sales, savings, spending mistakes, tips
I read this in Money Magazine and was dumbfounded.
“In a recent survey for the National Endowment for Financial Education, 42% of those under 40 reported getting financial help from their parents as adults.”
I realize there are circumstances under which you would need to accept help in an emergency. However, that 42% of us have had such emergencies in our adult life means one thing.
You’re not saving enough. You’re not INDEPENDENT from your parents!
So first things first… you need to start saving up. And this is NOT for a rainy day. Rainy day funds are from the jug. This is for your emergency fund and to get you into the habit of being saver. Financial responsibility isn’t an inherent talent. You learn it. You have to study it and hone your ability to know what is a want vs a need. Now you’re thinking “I’m not interested in being a financial genius.” Believe me, neither am I. What I AM interested in is feeling the confidence that unless something cataclysmic happens, I will not need to seek financial help from my parents. You know why that is so important?? Because I feel the entire weight of responsibility to save for my future. There is no fail-safe for me. Even though our parents are well-intentioned, by rescuing you every time you need help paying your car payment, they are giving you a “parents-as-the-backup mentality”. So let’s fix that. Because mom & dad aren’t always going to be around and let’s be honest, they deserve to enjoy their savings in their own retirement.
The rule of thumb that I like to start with is 3 months of your household expenses. If you lost your job today, it would give you 3 months to find another one. Some people say a flat amount like $10,000. If that is easier for you, then by all means do that.
Once you get your 3 months of expenses, go for 6 months or $20,000. If you have that, then go for a year or $50,000. The idea is get into the habit of saving. You can choose to put it in whatever account you like, money market, high yield savings accounts but just make sure you can get access to it within a few weeks time without penalty. (aka: Liquid)
If you already have an emergency fund then take a look at your retirement savings. According to Money Magazine, you should be saving at least 12% – 15% of your yearly income for retirement. Many companies have a 401k contribution match program. This is free money. Make sure you’re taking advantage of any opportunity to save tax free and get FREE money.
Believe me there is always a way to pare back your expenses. If this is a problem for you then look for a future post about how to cut the fat from your monthly budget. For now start with putting $5 a day in a jar. Every day. Voila! You just saved $150 in a month. Easy peasy. The key is making it a habit and committing to it. It doesn’t matter if it takes you a few years to save up your emergency fund. Just as long as you save regularly. It’s hard at first but then it gets to be so easy.
So get started. Today.
Leave a comment if you’ve already saved your emergency fund so we can congratulate you. If you haven’t, leave a comment committing to starting today. INDEPENDENCE people. It feels great.
Tags: budgeting, emergency fund, household finances, retirement, savings
We play the lottery every day and we win… every time.
Ok, now you’re getting suspicious. (what’s the gimmick here, Sam?)
Ok, you caught me. You caught the tater. (don’t know that reference? I feel sad for you.) When I say lottery, I don’t mean that money-sucking version of gambling you can play at 7-Eleven. I mean we take that money and put it in “The Jug”.
Let me explain young skywalker.
We have a big water jug. Like the kind the culligan man brings. Every day when we come home, any $1 bills and change are deposited into the jug. When it’s full, we take that puppy to the bank and cash her in for something fun.
There are several things going on here:
Consider your change to be found money. Stop buying small things (like a piece of paper with numbers on it) and start buying those fun big things you never seem to have the money for. You can even put a sign on the outside of the jug like “FAMILY BIG SCREEN” or “DISNEY”.
The jug allows you to win something with that $1 burning a hole in your pocket.
Get a jug. Put your change and $1 bills in the jug every day. Do it.
You know you want to.
Tags: budgeting, household finances, tips
This year the Mr. and I will celebrate our 10 year anniversary. That’s right. TEN YEARS. A decade. In the time we’ve been together we could have conceived and raised a 4th grader. We didn’t yet, our kids are still little but we could have.
I’m sure many people out there have secrets to a great marriage and can tell you how communication is the key. I’m going to tell you how to SURVIVE marriage. Because if you don’t survive marriage, then there’s nothing to communicate.
Why survive? Why does it sound so absolute… either you do or you don’t, right? Well many of us can live in a marriage for years and not be happy. A little part of you dies inside when you live in a crappy, loveless marriage where you’d rather work than spend time with your spouse. Where the dream of taking a vacation usually includes pictures of you alone on a beach reading or with your friends. Surviving a marriage is key these days. Survival of self and your relationship with your companion.
Remember when you got engaged? It was all kisses and late night talks. Then you got married, combined your checking account into a “joint account” and 2 years later you’re arguing over why you do or do NOT need that new TV.
How does this happen?
JOINT CHECKING
Ok let me explain before you discount my theory.
Joining your lives together means that you will have bills together. Mortgage, car payments, etc. Usually one of you is the “breadwinner” and the other is the “bread eater”?? (I don’t know what the other one is, I just figured if someone wins it then the other has to eat it right?). All of this bread goes into a big bowl and everyone eats from it. Joint Checking. Let me tell you how to keep from arguing over who deserves to decide how to distribute the bread.
When one person makes more than the other, or in our case, one of us makes money and the other doesn’t. The person who doesn’t bring home any bacon (another food analogy… I’m on a roll) feels like they have no right to decide what to do with it. Or in an effort to prove their worthiness they make a huge effort to feel equal and important. The person who makes the money also feels this internal struggle. And then you argue. And there’s tension.
Households don’t run unless there’s money. Regardless of who is making the biggest deposits into your account, money always complicates things. Let me introduce you to the answer:
Here’s how it works. On pay day or whatever frequency works for you, you each get an amount deposited into your individual accounts. Let’s say it’s $100 every two weeks. This is your paycheck. You each get the exact same amount. With this money you can do whatever you want. It’s YOUR money. Buy a handbag or makeup. Gadgets, hobbies and all things that are not deemed necessary come out of YOUR money. The husband and I even take our entertainment out of our own accounts. That way if we are eating out then one of us has to pay. It’s kind of like a date. 
Plus this levels the playing field when it comes to how much money you make. Do I still feel the pressure sometimes because I don’t bring home a regular paycheck? Yes. But I’m not feeling it when I’m spending my money, I’m feeling it when we’re looking at our balance sheet (I’ll explain this in the future) and I realize if I worked that “net worth” number would go up quicker.
The remainder of your money is deposited into your joint account. This account is where all your regular monthly bills come out of. We include mortgage, car payments, insurance, groceries, gas and daycare expenses. Anytime I need to spend out of that account and it NOT a regular expense, it gets discussed. For example, clothes for the kids, car maintenance, family gifts, etc.
Voila! 100% this saved our marriage. No longer did we argue over stupid things like going out for drinks with co-workers and blowing $100 on the bar tab. If I wanted to go spend $50 on makeup, I could, because it’s MY money. I can do whatever I want with it. He can do whatever he wants with his. End of story. Let me break it down for you below again:
INDIVIDUAL ACCOUNT: $____ Predetermined amount deposited into this account twice a month. Each person gets the exact same amount. I recommend that you don’t have access to each other’s accounts. Ours still have each other listed in case of emergency but he doesn’t carry a debit card for my account and vice versa. You can buy anything that’s not a household expense:
JOINT ACCOUNT: $____ Balance of your paycheck after your 401k contribution. The only things that come out of this account are monthly expenses. We even use auto-pay for as much as possible (except our mortgage so we can decide if we want to over-pay each month). Any other expense out of this account must benefit the entire household and be discussed. Here are a few examples of regular expenses:
Additional Expenses that must be discussed but can most likely come out of the Joint Account:
SAVINGS: At the end of each month we look at how much is left in our Joint Account and move it into our savings account. Once it’s there, it can’t be spent unless it’s an emergency or it’s being invested. I’ll talk more about this later.
Can you do this? Would this help?
Tags: budgeting, household finances, joint finances, savings, tips
This past week I was thrilled to attend my first blogging conference, ever. Out of many firsts, one of my favorite moments was meeting Rock Stars… Rascal Flatts. (I told them to be funny).
Being the newbie made me “sweat like Patrick Ewing in the 4th quarter” (love Chris Rock) but in the end I believe going alone and not knowing anything or anyone was actually the best for me.
A few things I learned: Continue reading
So in my last-ditch effort to avoid looking disheveled and totally out of my league at a blogging conference this week (Blissdom), I have researched outfits on Pinterest… which led me to my newest obsession, Polyvore.
Am I late to the party once again? This is like dress up dolls for adults! You can follow people and “love” the sets they put together. I am very fashion challenged so this is actually the most helpful for me. I even created my own “set” (aka outfit).
I think between this and Pinterest I just severely cut into my Facebook time. Leave a link to your Polyvore account and I will follow you!
If you want to follow me here are the links:
Tags: aboutme, Blissdom, creative energy, pinterest, polyvore
Next week it starts. Hundreds of women… creative, fun, giggly bloggers… will invade Nashville.
Blissdom Conference for Bloggers is an annual event hosted right in my town of Nashville. The Gaylord Opryland hosts this great event where women come from all over the country… world… together for a few days to talk about their blogs.
But the more I read about it and prepare, the more I am starting to get anxious. What should I wear? What sessions are best for me since I just started? Will there be anyone to eat lunch with?
And I realize now that I’m not alone. Many women are frightened at the thought of meeting their peers and feeling inferior. It’s like going back to the first day of high school when you knew it was better to act cool on the outside and pretend you didn’t care if anyone sat by you at lunch. But secretly just below the surface your heart is pounding and your eyes are searching for someone to connect with so you won’t be alone. I know this is going to be me. When in doubt I can see myself checking my phone too often… tweeting people and looking at Facebook just to look like I’m busy. But let’s face it. I’ll be secretly searching for a friend.
I always wanted to be in the cool crowd in high school. And if you ask my high school classmates they would probably tell you that I was in the cool crowd. The truth is I fluttered on the edge. I desperately wanted to be the center, the nucleus which determined the direction of the whole. However, I never felt in control. I felt like I followed the crowd around and used humor to prove my worthiness. That’s right. I was the “funny” one. Class Clown. Sarcastic Sam… that’s me.
But let’s be honest, cool crowds are overrated. So for this experience I am going to push that out of my mind and just search for the genuine people. I want to be amongst the supportive, sweet and genuine ones. Forget you cool crowd.
So there I will be. Eyes darting from here to there as I walk amongst hundreds of women with better outfits, better ideas and better blogs, searching for a genuine person or two that I can latch myself to so I won’t eat alone. I promise if it’s you, I will make you laugh. I make myself laugh all the time. I’m actually quite a hoot to be around. I’m just horrible at the initial introduction part.
Hi, whoever you are out there… future friend. I’m Sam. Sam I… nevermind. Will you eat lunch with me?
I will report back on whether or not I find a few good friends or eat lunch alone. Hopefully it’s the former.
Tags: aboutme, Blissdom, finding my religion, life
My daughter, Bug, as I affectionately call her, goes to “school” aka daycare disguised as preschool. She loves it. They teach her far more than I would ever know to even try to teach her and I think the social aspect of it has been great for her shy personality.
Holidays of course the school always does a little party. Inevitably her cubby is always chock full of little baggies of gifts from her classmates with overly ambitious mothers. I always struggle with this for a few reasons…
So I came up with the idea (inspired by my pinterest addiction) to just give a small card with one piece of chocolate or treat on it. Download a blank version here: Valentines Day Classroom Postcard Blank. Print it out and slap on a Dove Chocolate or one of these Marshmallow Hearts I got at Walmart (6 for $1). Voila! No more guilt!
Tags: free printable, gift idea, holidays, Valentine's Day
